For a few months now, much of your baby’s energy has been consumed by her need to move.
Now, as her first birthday approaches, she can get away, and scare herself when she discovers she is “on her own.” Diaper changes are another chance for her to wriggle away to play “catch-me-if-you-can!”
She is so busy, so squirmy, that it takes a very determined hand to keep her on her back when it is time to change her diaper.
A toy wont distract her for long enough anymore. She’s learned that dropping it over the edge of the changing table is too much fun.
As the toy disappears from view, she is testing out whether it is still anywhere at all, and whether it will come back. She is also testing you to see what will happen when you get exasperated!
By a year, a baby has learned to pull up, to stand. This new talent is so exciting that you may as well use it. Let the baby stand on the floor while you diaper her. Let her pull up and down on a railing or cruise on a safe piece of furniture while you change her. She’ll be so ready to try her balancing act that she’ll let you change her more readily if she can keep standing or moving the whole time.
For messy diapers, you’ll want to change her on the bathroom floor—or in the empty bathtub—as she pulls herself up and down and all along the bathtub. At least you can wash up more easily afterward. But don’t let her bump her head on the faucets.
As you diaper your baby on her feet, tell her why you are doing it that way. “You are so great on your feet that I don’t want to have to lay you down. You can help me change you already can’t you?” By explaining what you are doing, you are letting her begin to understand and encouraging her to participate. This is an early opportunity to set up a pattern of cooperation to fall back on if future struggles emerge—as they may when it is time for toilet training. There are so many areas in which you cannot give her control. But she’ll resent these less if you make it clear when she can be a “partner,” with choices that can be left up to her. “When you want to lie down, we can play our old games.” She may decide to do that, but she may not. Value this urge for independence.
As she approaches the end of her first year, a baby is already at work on three tasks that she will need later on, when she is ready for toilet training:
- Trying things out for herself and keeping you at bay;
- Finding out what happens to things when she can no longer see them; and
- Understanding what that look on your face means (for example, when you’ve had enough chasing and fetching), and how she ought to respond.
Once toilet training begins, she will want to handle her pee and BMs on her own, and keep you out of her business. She’ll worry about what happens to her BMs as she watches them swirl down the toilet and out of sight. And she’ll be checking your face to see if you’re worried too, if you’ll respect her as she masters the toilet for herself.
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Tags: 10-12 Months Toilet Training, Baby Toilet, Child Toilet Training, down the toilet, Toilet, toilet training, training
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